Reform with No Wasted Draws - The Legend of Koizumi Volume 1 Manga Review

When a manga has a two-page disclaimer, you know you're in for a good time. And let me tell you, Reform with No Wasted Draws - The Legend of Koizumi's first volume is a hell of a ride. My initial thought was, “Why bother with using real people?” but after reading this volume, I've come to understand why it was a much more effective way to go. Ohwada could have made fake countries and used fictional people, but this wouldn't have been half as outrageous and funny.

We begin with a George W. Bush—who, apparently, made his money gambling at mahjong—using a young, naïve member of the Diet (Taizo) to coax Japanese PM Junichiro Koizumi back to the mahjong table for a revenge match. Poor Taizo will be a tool, time and time again.

This first chapter is absolutely wild. I know nothing at all about mahjong, except for tidbits I picked up watching Saki, so the explanations wash over me. But images of Bush declaring riichi with “Bush Doctrine Preemptive Strike!” is both bananas and disturbingly accurate. As the narrative takes us from one negotiation-by-tsumo to another, we come to see that this, like so many other game-centric manga, is relying on tricks both real and fake to get Koizumi to the top. In one memorable scene, Koizumi rubs the pattern off a tile as he holds it ready to enter play. His grip is so strong, he dents the tile.

In a million years, I would never have imagined a manga like this. It's hilarious and over-the-top mahjong play, paired with pointed political commentary. The end of that pointed stick is usually someone else, but Koizumi's portentous pronouncement that to succeed in world politics, one must learn moves like “Rising Sun, The Peerless Patriot (13 sides, 13 orphans)” is outstandingly absurd. Sure, man. I'll get right on that. I also was not expecting that a publisher called Mahjong Pros would be so open to a fantasy mahjong/political book. When I saw the title, I rolled my eyes, expecting some conservative fantasy of traditional games and how that strengthens Japan. To be fair, this sort of does that, too, but with an excessiveness that inspired raucous laughter as I read.

In all honesty, I think the story here is innovative and fantastic (in both senses of that word). One can almost see the conversation that spawned it. A couple of guys hanging at the izakaya talking about how the world might look if foreign relations were settled over a polite game of mahjong. Then, as the drinks multiplied, the story got more and more bizarre.

I wouldn't say the art here is good, not for being poorly skilled, but rather for emphasizing odd choices. Koizumi is often presented belly first, even in a suit. Occasionally, a character is recognizable, as coincidental as that similarity is said to be. (Hi, Barbara Bush.) That said, George H. W. (Papa) Bush never had that much muscle on him, not even as a young man, so expect…liberties with the presentation. They did manage to get Putin shirtless in this volume, so I guess that goes under “recognizable.”

The lettering is fantastic, as it is wholly over the top, which matches the story. At one point, I was seriously marveling at lettering that was extraordinary as intrusive as the original must have been. No letterer is credited, but my hat is off to that unnamed artist.

The final pages have a short memoir by the author along the lines of “look how anxious this volume made me.” This was followed by pages of notes on mahjong terms and phrases used in the text. And finally, it ends up with a discussion of some mahjong plays, not that anyone, anywhere, is reading this manga to learn about mahjong. This a fantasy gaming story for people already familiar with mahjong, who want to be thrilled by imaginative uses of what they already know.

Back to that two-page disclaimer I mentioned in the opening sentence of this review, I think that if you're the kind of person to be offended at this manga with its sometimes mildly offensive portrayal of certain men (and a few women) of power, then you're probably not reading this manga in the first place. But I appreciate the care and attention the publishers took in trying to cover their bases.

Even if the idea that Prime Ministers and Presidents play a game to settle global disputes isn't disturbing, I will offer a content warning for the segment with Japanese PM Shinzo Abe for suicide. Koizumi is shot and bleeds through a whole segment, and Taizo is kidnapped, stripped down, and held in bondage gear more than once. This is not mahjong for the faint-hearted.

I have no idea if anyone other than me might end up reading this, but this volume is amazing, in both good and bad ways. North Korea versus Japan, while PM Koizumi is bleeding from multiple bullet wounds, Vladimir Putin is playing mahjong with Japanese PM Shinzo Abe over Baltic Sea fleets. Seppuku, snipers, missiles, kidnapping, mahjong… It's just…incredible.

It is utterly ridiculous, but wow, Reform with No Wasted Draws - The Legend of Koizumi was so much more interesting than I expected!