Haruka Kotoura was an ordinary little girl. She was born into a wealthy family to a pair of loving and doting parents, but she wasn’t at all spoiled. She was well liked by her peers, and had an easy time making friends, right up until something peculiar happened... She began reading minds. At first, she didn’t even notice this. She could hear peoples’ thoughts as naturally as their voices, so she assumed this was normal, and people were telling her things they wanted her to hear. It started small, winning every round of rock-paper-scissors, but it quickly snowballed into who had a crush on who, secrets her parents were keeping, small resentments that should have stayed hidden, and ultimately the fact that her parents were cheating on each other.

This new power, the consequences of which she couldn’t possibly understand, tore her life to shreds. Her friends deserted her, doctors refused to treat her, her parents abandoned her, and everywhere she looked for support or affection, a few select words echoed in everyone’s thoughts... Monster. Creepy. Freak. Liar. These words would follow her for the next decade until a broken, hopeless young woman finally decided to change schools... And that’s where she met Manabe, a dimwitted class clown who didn’t find her abilities weird or creepy... He thought they were cool! This new encounter would only be the start of Haruka’s journey to undo the trauma that she’d endured throughout her life, but will it all be too-little-too-late? Or is she truly worthy of the life she’s been given?

Kotoura-san was produced by AIC, a Japanese studio whose pedigree stretches back to the late 1980s, and whose output is every bit as eclectic as my personal taste in music. They’ve dipped their fingers in basically everything, from soft-core porn to heartwarming wholesome sports drama, pumping out mostly weird and quirky titles that either pique the interest of the anime fandom and then die out in a couple years, or remain in the public consciousness entirely because of how bizarre they are. Their most famous titles seem to come from franchises like Tenchi Muyo that were already famous BEFORE AIC got to take a crack at them, if that tells you anything.

What’s more interesting about AIC is that from the early 2000s up to the end of it’s life in 2014, it started branching off into smaller studios. AIC Plus, AIC Build, AIC Spirits, AIC ASTA, and in this case, AIC Classic, a subsection that only produced three titles(and their respective OVAs). One of them was Ebiten, a show so weird that I had wildly different experiences both times I watched it, and another one was today’s subject, Kotoura-san. Like most of their work, The animation feels like it had a somewhat modest budget... Not dripping with cash, but not forced to cut corners to make ends meet either... That it had just as much money as it needed, and it made every penny count.

It’s hard to look for trends in AIC’s catalogue, but Kotoura-san has the style of it’s director all over it. You probably know Masahiko Ohta from titles like Yuru Yuri and Himouto Umaru-chan, and that’s basically the aesthetic you’ll see here. Bright colors from a soft water color palette, somewhat cartoony character design combined with more-or-less realistic proportions below the neck, just exaggerated enough to create a design style that’s very easy on the eyes, cute and moe for the most part but more than capable of providing fanservice when needed. Kotoura-san isn’t really a fanservice show... It has it’s moments, mostly for comedic purposes... Rather, it takes the versatility of Ohta’s character designs in a different direction.

The cast of Kotoura-san looks soft and cartoony at first glance, but they are extremely expressive. They support a wide array of facial expressions, a lot of which do serve the comedic side of the story perfectly, but their dramatic expressions? THAT is on another level. I can’t begin to count the number of moments when a sudden shift in someone’s expression, particular with the title character, gave me goosebumps, or straight up hurt my heart. I felt what these characters felt, way more often than I would normally expect from a 12 episode anime, although the music did play a part in that. Yasuhiro Misawa has composed a lot of OSTs for Ohta, and while he does your standard plinky-plink anime sitcom music perfectly fine... A show like Kotoura-san wouldn’t exist without some BGM like that... His music is far more remarkable during the emotional moments, when he switches to full orchestra, letting violins and other string-based instruments dominate the tracks that play softly in the background of sad scenes, and get cranked up to eleven whenever it needs to overwhelm you in a tense or suspenseful moment.

There’s no English dub as of this writing, and there will probably never be one, but the sub track is still pretty appealing, even to my ignorant monolingual ears. I don’t have anything specific to say about most of the cast, who play their roles perfectly, but the one standout in particular to me is Hisako Kanemoto, the original voice actor of Squid Girl if you can believe it, playing Haruka as the most precious gorram thing ever, simultaneously adorable and fragile, but still with tight comedic delivery whenever she’s dealing with Jun Fukushima’s rowdy Manabe. The lack of a dub is disappointing or me, but I like the Japanese version just fine, and you should too.

Is it just me, or was 2013 a really big year for anime? I guess it’s possible that I’m biased, as that was the one year I really got into seasonal releases, but there were a lot of high profile titles debuting that year. There was Attack on Titan, Kill La Kill, Love Live, Watamote, Log Horizon, Nagi Asu, The Devil is a Part Timer... Those titles alone are massive, but when you add in continuations of popular shows like Haganai, Oreimo, Fate, Ghost in the Shell and my personal favorite season of Rozen Maiden, you create a field where there’s just a ton of competition lurking around every corner. I’ve reviewed a dozen anime from this year, more than any other individual year so far. Not only were there a ton of major game changers, but even the dregs were at least interestingly bad. Anime as uniquely terrible as Amnesia, Diabolik Lovers, Dog X Scissors and Sasami-san@Ganbaranai couldn’t have come out any other year.

The reason I bring this up is because it’s the best explanation I can come up with for just how obscure Kotoura-san is. If there was a year for a good show to get thoroughly lost in the shuffle, especially in the winter season, 2013 was it, and yet that still doesn’t explain how it fell flat compared to crap like Senran Kagura and Cuticle Detective Inaba. I guess it’s possible that it just didn’t have a catchy sounding title... A name like Kotoura-san doesn’t exactly grab you, but then again, the name the western market came up with... The Troubled Life of Miss Kotoura... Doesn’t sound that much better. I’m being intentionally coy, of course. I am aware of the major backlash this series faced, I just don’t like talking about it because it’s complete horse shit. When this show first aired, it caught a lot of criticism for being emotionally manipulative, which I absolutely do not see.

I mean sure, the first episode starts off by showing you an extended flashback to the main character’s childhood, and how her ESP ability ruined her life, and yeah, you’re supposed to feel really bad for her after seeing it, but that’s not manipulation. When I hear the phrase ‘emotional manipulation’ used to describe an anime, I think of shows from the critically lauded Key trilogy, as popular as they are. Melodrama framed as actual drama, hyper-idealized waifus dying from moe mystery disease, all to inspire a couple of manly tears from some bland dude at the center whose entire harem would rather die alone than pork anyone else. Blatantly using wish fulfillment tropes to get you invested before the tragic shit drops out of nowhere is true emotional manipulation.

Harems are not realistic. Five year olds who immediately accept their father who they’ve never seen before, behave perfectly when left alone all day and then just die for the feels are not realistic, they’re manufactured, which makes them manipulative. When it comes to Haruka’s backstory, however, the only part of it that feels unrealistic is the fact that she can read minds. Everything else feels real. The way people react to her feels real. The fact that Haruka didn’t know she was doing anything wrong until it was too late to change it feels real. The fact that she finds one final source of solace, a stray kitten she bonds with, only for her psyche to absolutely shatter when it’s abruptly taken away from her, feels painfully real, but most of all is the experience of rejection by society, the loneliness and isolation that results from being a variety of ‘different’ that your peers aren’t ready to accept in a world that’s constantly bombarding you with the advice to ‘just be yourself.’

I’ll admit that with a scenario like this... Or the one from Watamote, if you will... In order to appreciate just what Kotoura’s going through, you kind of have to have had a taste of it yourself. Personally, I was diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome as a toddler, and I have honestly never known what it’s like to be a normal person with normal thoughts and behaviors, and even now that I’m older and happier with my lot in life, there’s always going to be a massive disconnect between me and normal people. Luckily, though, the first episode doesn’t dwell on any of this. Kotoura-san lets you know very early on, and very efficiently, what the main character went through, why she is how she is, and just how many layers of trauma she’s carrying on her at all times before introducing Manabe in one of the most well timed and deliriously funny ways possible, letting you know that okay, from here on, it’s time to start healing.

Haruka has a ton of issues. Some are on the surface, like her fear of hurting those close to her with her abilities, others are deeper, like her guilt and general lack of self-worth. Her issues are handled with a shocking level of respect and maturity, given that this is a comedy anime, and at no point does any of it feel disingenuous. One thing I noticed is that Kotoura-san does not fuck around with it’s story, or Haruka’s arc. Nothing is ever milked, nothing is ever dwelled on, and despite everything that’s happened to her, Haruka never goes all emo on us. This is pulled off through a genius trick of pacing where Haruka is constantly working on her smaller issues, overcoming them and moving on, but her larger issues are always lurking in the background, making their presence known through brief references and subtle visual cues.

Another criticism I see this show get is over the inconsistent tone, which, yeah, okay, fair, but I actually kind of like that. Sure, the drama and comedy might not blend as fluidly as they do in Ouran Highschool Host Club, but they’re both made out of really strong material, and if anything, the fact that they clash just makes them each feel stronger. If I hadn’t been laughing my ass off five minutes prior, I might not feel as disturbed when I see Haruka have a visceral reaction to someone using a trigger word like ‘Monster’ on her. Haruka’s journey throughout the story is a powerful one, and there is potential in tonal dissonance to amplify power when used right. This is one of the few series that make me cry every time I see it, with both happy tears and sad tears in equal portions.

And the comedy, likewise, is outstanding. In my opinion, casting the girl crazy comic relief loser(who would normally be a supporting role at best) as the male lead in a romantic comedy was a galaxy brain move. Most characters in his position would either be a cool, stoic dreamboat or a firey, hotheaded tough guy, your simple fire vs. ice dynamic, your Edward vs. Jacob if you will, Manabe is neither. He’s an idiot. He’s earnest, loyal and outgoing, a complete airhead, and yet the way he supports Haruka... The way he broke through her shell when nobody else would... I never for once doubt her feelings for him. They have this really unique dynamic where he’ll fantasize about her in these over-the-top, completely self aware ecchi scenarios just to tease her so she’ll become flustered and interrupt his fantasy, an idea that COULD sound creepy and lecherous on paper, but winds up feeling adorable and downright hilarious in practice.

The comedy in general is really quirky and unpredictable, with very few running gags, and the ones we do get are constantly evolving. There are moments when one interaction will be happening, but if you pay attention to the background of the shot, or even to the body language of characters who aren’t even talking, there’ll be a whole other layer to the joke just waiting to be noticed. The story goes to some weird places for comedy’s sake, and while I can’t say they all pay off, they can be amazing when they do. Seeing Haruka’s rich grandfather build a theme park for Haruka featuring her likeness is just weird, and not in a fun way so much as in a ‘what the fuck am I supposed to do with this’ kind of way. On the other hand, seeing him and Manabe try to dig their own hot spring out of disappointment for the real one being closed, only to strike oil by accident, and the rest of the scene plays out with construction vehicles working in the background as he adds that oil to his already considerable wealth, that’s fucking great.

There are moments that honestly feel like the pacing may have been a bit too efficient, like they had extra space they didn’t know what to do with, but luckily, Haruka and Manabe have costars who are more than strong enough to offer their own contributions to the series in order to pick up some of that slack. In episode two, Haruka and Manabe get recruited to a club called the ESP Research society through some SOS Brigade-like hijinks(yes, there’s an element of Haruhi Suzumiya in this show, we’re talking about the early 2010s, hell there were like half a dozen titles in the 2013 winter season alone that ripped Haruhi off to some degree) and it’s through this encounter that we not only get the school club setting to serve as a foundation for the story, but the character of Mifune, who has a fair share of ESP related trauma of her own to deal with.

The humor can be mean sometimes, and it can be off-balance with the more serious aspects of the show which I would argue make up more of it’s identity, especially around the middle, but the pay off at the end is definitely worth it. There’s a story arc toward the end that’s kind of dumb... It revolves around the police and a serial attacker, and it’s not bad or anything, which is a relief considering how unskippable it is, but it’s still kind of dumb, especially once the mystery is actually solved. It does, however, lead me to one of my favorite aspects of this series... The fact that no idea is ever left on the table. I’m sure there are some possibilities involving mind-reading in a fictional setting that were never addressed, but it never feels like they actually missed an opportunity, and it never feels like there was some obvious answer to a story line problem that got ignored for plot reasons.

By the end, it feels like it did exactly what it set out to do, and then some, and I’m not going to pretend that it’s not a mess, but it’s a powerful mess, and it’s one that I definitely recommend checking out... If you have access to it. As of this writing, the only legitimate way to watch this series is by streaming it on Crunchyroll. There was a blu ray set available stateside from Aniplex, but it was an extremely limited release that’s no longer available for purchase, you can’t find it on Ebay outside of Malaysian bootlegs, and the manga never received an English release either.

So what exactly happened here? How did this series, which managed to be equal parts adorable, hilarious and heart-breaking, manage to fall so far out of public consciousness? Is it simply due to it’s presence in the winter season, where in any given year only one non-ecchi title will usually be enough of a cultural phenomenon to break through, and it just couldn’t compete with Love Live? Is it the fact that a series that intentionally uses tonal dissonance to amplify its own emotional beats was just ahead of it’s time? Or was it just such a weird, quirky, unpredictable ride that most viewers just weren’t willing to jump on board? I don’t know, but for what it’s worth, I love it. If you were to ask me for an under-rated hidden gem, it would be my first answer. All I can really say is check it out and see what experience you have with it.

I give Kotoura-san an 8/10.