VAMPIRE HOLMES

This show is genuinely hideous, with one exception.

There is nothing meaningful to discuss about it, and I can't even try to spoil some stuff to present my case, a cursory glance at the first episode clearly shows how terrible it is at... everything. I am also left wondering why "Vampire" is even in the title, given the complete absence of vampires from the anime.

It should have been a promotional material for the detective-style game the anime was based on, but it ended up being a disgusting promo that arguably caused fewer people to be interested in the game.

Because of the lack of budget, they just skipped solving any case (which is the main reason one would have downloaded the game, to begin with) and resolved them off-screen during the last episode. This appalling decision makes me question what was the point of a promotional material that doesn't even hook you into the meat of the game, but on the contrary, keeps you from touching it with a 10-foot pole.

I would usually try to briefly analyze the story/art/sound/character departments but there is just nothing of value all around. It's all pure, unadulterated garbage.

There is barely any animation, and when it is there, we are dealing with powerpoint-level stuff, everything is recycled to nauseous degrees, sound effects are ear-bleeding, visual effects are actual, unironical stock effects that you can find in Youtube videos back from 2006, the "jokes" aren't fun and just don't work, and even if they were, the comedic timings are all over the place, the characters themselves are annoying, the voice actors are amateurish, random stuff keeps happening for no reason whatsoever, with no continuity between episodes...
I hope this is enough to prove my case.

One thing I want to stress though is that this anime shows how important the budget is to make people laugh. Granted, the jokes are shit anyway, but even if that weren't the case, the pitiful amount of budget wouldn't have allowed enjoying this even from an ironic perspective. This is why I had to increase the speed for a less-than-3-min-per-episode anime.

Sure, there are exceptions to the rule, you have stuff like inferno Cop that with a similar budget still manages to get a few chuckles from the viewers (I thought it was repetitive after a few episodes, but still better than this pile of dregs). Why was that? Novelty effect + way better comedic timings and jokes. Inferno Cop didn't take itself seriously, it knew it was shit from the get go, Vampire Homles didn't.

The only exception comes from the OP (which is recycled as the ED, lol). Whilst not pathetic, it is still dreadful and tiresome, given the fact that it occupies 1/3 of the running time of each episode. I am fairly confident that almost the entirety of the budget was spent on the singer.

Avoid like the plague, there are better trash anime, like mars of destruction, Skelter Heaven, Ex-Arms, Arifureta...or you could watch paint dry. It's basically the same, anyway.